Teaching Gratitude: How ABA Can Help Kids Express Thanks in Their Own Way

As the season of gratitude arrives, many families take time to reflect on the people and moments they’re thankful for. For children with autism, expressing that same gratitude might look a little different — and that’s okay. Every child has their own unique way of showing appreciation, love, and connection. At its heart, gratitude isn’t about the words we use; it’s about recognizing kindness and finding ways to respond to it.

Gratitude Can Look Different for Every Child

Some children may say “thank you” with a smile, a high-five, or by sharing a favorite toy. Others might show it through small acts — helping clean up, offering a hug, or simply being near someone they care about. When we expand our view of what gratitude can look like, we begin to see it everywhere: in gestures, routines, and moments of connection that reflect care and appreciation.

How ABA Therapy Helps Build These Skills

Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) therapy supports the development of social and communication skills that make it easier for children to express gratitude in ways that feel natural for them. Through positive reinforcement, modeling, and practice, ABA team members can help children:

Learn how to respond to kind actions (“thank you,” smiles, or eye contact).

Recognize emotions in others — understanding when someone does something kind.

Practice turn-taking, sharing, and perspective-taking — all building blocks of empathy.

Develop language and nonverbal skills to express appreciation authentically.

Each of these moments is a step toward helping children connect more deeply with the people around them.

Celebrating Progress, Not Perfection

For many families, progress might be subtle: a child handing you their drawing after you helped them, or pausing to smile when you give them a favorite snack. Those are beautiful expressions of gratitude. ABA helps families recognize and reinforce these moments, celebrating them as meaningful communication.

Ways Families Can Encourage Gratitude at Home

You can nurture thankfulness in daily routines by:

Modeling appreciation — let your child see and hear you say “thank you” often.

Creating visual supports — simple picture cues for greetings or gratitude moments.

Building “thankful time” into routines — a nightly ritual of naming one thing you appreciated today, even if it’s something small.

Celebrating all expressions — whether verbal or nonverbal, each attempt at gratitude deserves recognition.

In Every Form, Gratitude Connects Us

This season — and throughout the year — remember that gratitude doesn’t have to sound a certain way to be real. When children are supported in expressing thanks in ways that are true to them, we not only teach a social skill; we nurture confidence, empathy, and connection.